Word Choices

Oh, Lord, those words we choose to use really do matter.

I just completed a great 3 day course at work on the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Years ago I listened to this on tape and like the millions before and since who've experienced this great book, I too, drew inspiration and hope from the truth of its message. The lessons are so simple and so profound at the same time.

Habit 1 is the "Pro-Active Habit". It is knowing that you have power, your life is not fate-driven, but choice-driven. This is nothing short of revolutionary thinking! I can clearly recall being absolutely certain that we were all a victim of fate at the sweet, tender age of only 17 . It just must be so, I reasoned, as my English teacher, Mr. Peter Majoy, taught us about all kinds of philosophers who thought about and expanded upon this idea of fate and how we had all been pre-determined to the lives we got and ultimately, to the final resting place of either heaven or hell. I was absolutely convinced that I had no hope of changing my already pre-determined, pre-defined life. The Doors were singing, "I woke up this morning and got myself a beer. The future's uncertain and the end is surely near." I felt the same way. Exactly. Then Mr. Majoy brought in a new philosopher or two and I had to rethink this understanding I had developed. Oh my God...are we really controlled or not?

I think of Lt. Dan in the movie, Forrest Gump. Oh how he relished and enjoyed the idea of fate having dealt him his honorable death in war. He loved this idea and hated Forrest for taking this away from him. I think of Forrest's mother and how she told Forrest, Life is What You Make It. By the end of the movie, Forrest tells the grave and his beloved Jenny how he thinks they're both right, both Lt. Dan and his mother. And I guess that's how I think of it, too, now with some more life experiences and some more time under my belt.

I can't direct the wind, but I can adjust my sails.

So, what's all this got to do with words?

First the word, the thought, then the action. As you think it, imagine it, so it is.

In my Catholic upbringing, we learned this from the Gospel of John, "In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God. And the Word was made Flesh." So many meanings in this little text. To me, one of the deepest meanings is the power of seeing things, the power of choosing, deliberately. Ideas happen and actions stem from those thoughts. The Word was made Flesh. The thought is made action. As Mother Theresa pointed out, we are Love in Action. Where's the Love come from? Our thoughts, our words create our deeds, so we need to have the thoughts of love before the actions of love.

I know this is crazy, but I think even our passwords, in this crazy life full of passwords, are really indicative of our thoughts. My grandmother, the best person I ever, ever knew had succumbed to having to get an ATM card for my aunt to have some modern conveniences in handling her money before she died. "Ma, we need to get a password for you. What do you want it to be?" She explained what this meant, and without having to think, in a quick pause my grandmother picked her word. LOVE. I thought, OF COURSE! It could be nothing, nothing, except this word.

I went to another training course for some technical SAP training and of course, you need a password to enter the site and do the work. I had to share computers and my co-learner, Nyda Faith (if you can believe this, FAITH is her real name) asks me what should our password be? I don't know, I don't care. SUCCESS, says Nyda. Later, we got together and had a great talk about the possibilities and power in envisioning our lives. Nyda is determined to lead and be and live a successful life, in every manner and meaning this word has. Success in living, doing, contributing. If you can breathe sucessfully, then Nyda breathes this way. (We met, I'm sure, because of fate, by the way.)

So the words we choose, even our crazy passwords, are like little keys. Little sticky notes, that tell a story in a word.

What's your password? What's your word?